19 Januari 2013. I lost the baby.

Nothing much to say. I lost the baby. That is real. That is the fact.

Sad. Regret. Stress. I am complete insane if I said I don't feel that. TIPU.

Nevertheless. Alhamdulillah, with the iman of the thinnest as the onion's I can feel Allah is always beside me. A true companion. Affectionately. With the tears all nights. The sadness all day along, hidden in a fake smiles. I manage to send my message to Allah. And indeed HE heard mine. Sunnatullah, HE took the baby. But HE actually is giving me a bunch of loves that i get from the people around me. Parents. And families. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah.

Ya ni'mal mujib (3x).

Recovering I am. Supports I called forth. A shoulder to lean. And a pillow for rest.

Ibu and Babah's love

Our dearest

I am suppose to be in my 8++ weeks of pregnancy. But the baby only 5 weeks in size. Doctor gave another 2 weeks to see the progress. If Allah's will and everything ok, alhamdulillah. If not, abortion is a must. 

Nothing in this world is ours. All are Allah's. Dia boleh bagi semua ni dan Dia jugalah boleh ambil kembali drpd kita hambaNya yg lemah ni. Above of all, miracle can happen.

Teringat pesanan Prof Muhaya:

     "Siapa kita untuk memaksa Allah memberi kita zuriat. Bersihkan hati perbetulkan niat apa kita mahukan anak? Jika dgn zuriat kita berniat mendidiknya menjadi hamba dan khalifah Allah yg terbaik, inshaAllah Tuhan akan permudahkan. Elakkan berniat membangga diri dan menunjuk2."

Submit all and let Him do the rest. Bimillahi tawakkaltu ala Allah.

New life. New Beginning.

2012 left us officially.
The cries, laughs, happy and sorrows, hurts and heals, all had been collected in the 2012 diary.

Being proposed by a stranger whom now i called husband. The man whom i love most. New family new faces.
Being left by beloved sister whom now we cherish her baby. The cries that won't stop.
New career improvement with lots of networks and teamwork upgraded. New experience working oversea.
New improvement in family relationship. From sourness to sweetness. Rebinding.
Little sister's graduation and new employment. First time being apart from my shadow.
Health condition dropping down. More visits to doctors.
Living alone and now two.
.....and lots more that aren't able to be explained here.

2nd day 2013;

Restructuring. New employment. New job role and hoping for more career improvement.
From two becoming three. Awaiting the presence of our sweetheart. New family member. After Aidilfitri inshaAllah.
Hub's career stability and business improvement.
New house, new home, new living environment.
.....and of course with lots of Allah's plan for us.

We plan, Allah plan. And verily, Allah is the Most Ultimate Planner.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Memulakan 2013 dgn langkah lebih teguh dan lebih kuat. Bersama semua insan tersayang dan yg akan terus diingati.