Parenting (taken from "He Who Laughs,Last!")

Story 1: So Much Hair

A little boy was eating breakfast one morning and got to thinking about things.


"Mommy, Mommy, why doesn't Daddy have very many hairs on his head?" he asked his mother.


"He thinks a lot," replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with such a diplomatic explanation for her husband's baldness.


Her son thought for a second and asked, "So, why do you have so much hair?"

Story 2: Burnt Offering

The rule for my children is if they complain about my cooking, they have to cook the next meal.

One busy evening, the skin on the chicken I was roasting got too dark and my nine-year-old son eyed the meat and said glumly, "Burnt chicken again." Looking at me, he quickly blurted, "Just the way I like it!"

Story 3: Cow's Milk

It was a rare treat that little Russel got to drink chocolate milk instead of the regular, unflavored type.

One day, after enjoying a cold glass of chocolate milk, he smacked his lips and with a satisfied look on his face asked, "Mom, does chocolate milk come from brown cows?"

Story 4: Singular vs. Plural

Justin was doing his homework one day. "What's the plural of 'child'?" he read out loud.

Without a beat, his little brother Martyn quipped, "Kids!"

Story 5: Diapers

A young couple expecting their first baby was enthusiastically shopping for diapers in preparation for the arrival of their little one.

Knowing nothing about the diapers, the wife looked at the different sizes available. "Up to 4.5kg...4-6kg...12+kg...16+kg..." she read each label.

Puzzled about which she would buy, the frustrated wife asked her husband, "How am I to know how heavy Baby's poop is going to be?"

Story 6: A Good Father

"A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society." - Billy Graham

Story 7: Mother

Your mother is always with you...She's the whisper of the leaves as you walk down the street; she's the smell of bleach in your freshly laundered socks; she's the cool hand on your brow when you're not well. Your mother lives inside your laughter. And she's crystallized in every teardrop.

She's the place you came from, your first home; and she's the map you follow with every step you take. She's your first love and your first heartbreak, and nothing on earth can separate you. Not time, not space...not even death!